I’ve had beautiful and traumatic experiences with Ayahuasca this week at Rythmia in Costa Rica. Santha and I and our daughter Shanti have been part of a group of close to 100 people and every ceremony has been magnificent and incredibly well handled.

I have described in previous posts what I went through on nights 1, 2 and 3. See here: https://goo.gl/ZsQoJq

And here: https://goo.gl/3cWLuH

Night 4 was another tough one, with almost zero visions — rather unusual for me — but a lot of deep reflection about what I’m doing, and failing to do, with the precious gift of life in a human body. The gift comes from the universe but in the universe there is a principle of reciprocity and we must give as well as receive. Am I giving enough back? Or far too little?

Normally I would put such questions to Mother Ayahuasca, and she would answer me, yet the only answer I received this week was the direct experience of my own death. I concluded that this experience was most probably NOT an imminent reality but symbolism giving me the opportunity, if only I could read the symbols right, to learn and grow and develop.

But of course I wanted and hoped for more answers.

I didn’t get those answers on night 4, or at least not as I had expected. But then, in the hour before dawn, our shaman offered me a healing, a full-on, energetic driving of the altered state of consciousness towards focus and clarity and an opportunity for the goddess to do her work at the levels of both body and spirit. Then I did get an answer of sorts for suddenly out of the darkness there appeared a burst of light and framed within it the head and glowing golden eyes of a black jaguar.

Mother Ayahuasca is a shape shifter and the black jaguar is one of the classic forms in which I have met her many times before. The message she gave me on this occasion, however, was unsettling. The channel that for so long has connected me to her level of vibration was clouded and what had clouded it was levatiracetam, the anticonvulsant drug that I have been prescribed in high doses since my grand mal epileptic seizures in 2017 (https://goo.gl/drHyiS). While taking this pharmaceutical drug, I was led to understand, my channel to the realm of the goddess could never be clear. If I want to work with her again then I must desist taking the anticonvulsants that have kept me seizure-free since my last attack in August 2017.

Even though the ceremonies for this week are over, and I’m returning to the UK very soon, the immediate effect was that I didn’t take my daily doses of levatiracetam on Friday and have taken none again today (Saturday 1 December). Probably this isn’t very smart! There are medical doctors here amongst our group, and a surgical nurse, and they have all kindly urged me NOT to go cold turkey on the anticonvulsants. if I’m determined to stop I should taper the dose gradually. So I’m going to sleep on this and make a decision tomorrow. Perhaps the wise thing to do would just be to return to my usual dose until the next opportunity to encounter Ayahuasca arises, then taper down to zero in the week or two before the ceremonies and then taper up again afterwards. We shall see. But meanwhile I miss that clear channel!

I have witnessed the almost miraculous effects that Ayahuasca has had on many members of our group during this week. There have been such profound realisations, such life-changing and life-affirming experiences, such beauty, such joy and such love. It is as though my closest family has suddenly expanded to encompass this wonderful new soul family that I have been integrated with through the enchantment of the brew and the magic of the ceremonies. There are people here from many different walks of life and from many different nations and ethnicities and what we have all found is the common ground that unites us.

Would it could be so, always, for the entire human family! There is so much division in the world today, so much hatred, so much fear, so much suspicion and so much greed that our species seems close to tearing itself apart and rendering the Earth uninhabitable in the process.

What fools we are to allow such a state of affairs to persist, and to allow politicians and religious mis-leaders – for their own short-term gain — to divide us from one another in order to rule us.

Brothers and sisters, wherever we are, no matter on which land or under which political or religious system chance brought us to be born, the time has come to awaken from this nightmare of our own making and remember the truth about ourselves — that we are all members of one family, no matter how widely scattered, that none of us have the slightest justification to claim superiority over any other, and that we all share the same hopes, fears, courage, fragility and capacity for love.

United we stand. It is just plain madness to continue to allow ourselves to be divided and defined by the artificial barriers of nation, race or creed. We must remember our common humanity, remember that we are one family, and put that realisation first before all other considerations if our species is to survive the challenges of the coming years and return once again to being good stewards of this precious garden of a planet.

[Image courtesy of Pixbay, CC0 Creative Commons.]

52 thoughts on “Returning to Ayahuasca after three years away — night 4”

  1. Kerry says:

    This is absolutely fascinating, Graham – and as always I’m full of gratitude that you take these journeys in the place of those of us who are still daunted by the prospect.

    One thing I can’t reconcile about our guilt as a species – is the fact that I don’t believe our folly was historically or currently IS avoidable. I think we were forced by circumstance into becoming a technological species and that as soon as this happens, we’re destined to move towards extinction, since this is an ongoing dynamic of alienation from nature. It’s written in full here – http://www.bloombook.co/2018/09/15/whats-the-problem-3/ – but this isn’t advertising – I’m happy for this comment to go unpublished, but I wanted to pass it on to you though. Because my current problem with this belief is that I don’t know where to go from here… I can’t see what the best path for humanity now is – perhaps your insights can help…

  2. KC, Holistic FNP says:

    Please look at the ketogenic diet & it’s use for individuals with seizures – perhaps it is a potential solution for you. Do wean off slowly should you choose to discontinue your seizure med & have a trusted medical provider you can call if you encounter issues.

  3. Owen says:

    Hello Mr Hancock, my name is Owen May, and I have been loosely following your work as well as that of Randal Carlson. I am spiritually open minded-or so I believe to be. I am more than ready to jump headfirst into the exact type of groundbreaking research and quest of knowledge that you seem to be on in this life, and am looking for guidance as to where I should begin said quest. So far I seem to be interested greatly in sites such as Gobekli Tepe, and challenging mainstream academia. I feel shut down and at times degraded by my peers and even family, and wish to be in company of those who are open to admiting error and looking for the truth. I would also say I am a bit too invested in the annunaki side of this, and its driving me mad looking at what so many others have overlooked time and time again. I would love to be a potential anthropologist but maybe the spiritual side of this has another path for which I am to stray perhaps. I am but 19 at the moment, and feel as if though I am being called upon by something deep inside the fibers of my being to get off my ass and find out who we really are. This led me to recently purchase magicians of the gods, which i am more than exited to begin reading. May Peace and good health bless you and your beloved. Cheers.

  4. Ken mitchell says:

    Graham, one does not need a psychotropic Helper to reach the Great Mother. A shamanic journey involving a simple drum beat in the theta range (6 beats per second) puts one in the trance state needed to fly into the spirit realm. I have done this over 1500 times. Look into that, my friend. No drugs needed.

    1. Brandon Jones says:

      I have no doubt that you’ve accomplished this. However, I think you should not ignore how powerful a tool psychoactive drugs are in achieving these states of mind. While forms of assisted meditation are a fascinating tool by themselves, adding drugs on top of that can very likely be a much more intense experience.

    2. Mary Evans says:

      John Lamb Lash (telestai) has also mentioned that sacred plants are not the only way to the truth. Perhaps we reach for power plants when we’ve exhausted our imagination. As a student of planetary tantra (nemeta.org) we can make direct contact with the source. Perhaps some of us feel it necessary to take an extra step.

  5. Adam says:

    Hi, Graham.

    I worry about you not taking your meds but at the same time know that meds for epilepsy tend to rot the brain.

    Do you regularly practice some kind of pure meditation like zazen or vipassana. I found that regular practice got rid of all epileptic symptoms for me.

  6. Mark T Jones says:

    THE FEELING OF KNOWLEDGE LOST IS ACTUALLY KNOWLEDGE OF HISTORICAL INGREDIENTS. THE INGREDIENTS ARE CREATION, FLOURISH, CORRUPTION, DESTRUCTION, RECREATION, CORRUPTION, SACRIFICE OF SON. FROM THE SACRIFICE OF GOD’S SON THE INGREDIENTS MIGHT BE WHAT ONE WOULD CALL “AND OTHER INGRES. A MIXED BAG OF INDIVIDUAL BELIEVERS, FENCE RIDERS, THE ADVANTAGE TAKERS THAT THINK THEY HAVE A FENCE TO RIDE AND THE MEN WHO CHOOSE EVIL.

  7. Mark T Jones says:

    THE FEELING OF KNOWLEDGE LOST IS ACTUALLY KNOWLEDGE OF HISTORICAL INGREDIENTS. THE INGREDIENTS ARE CREATION, FLOURISH, CORRUPTION, DESTRUCTION, RECREATION, CORRUPTION, SACRIFICE OF SON. FROM THE SACRIFICE OF GOD’S SON THE INGREDIENTS MIGHT BE WHAT ONE WOULD CALL “AND OTHER INGRES. A MIXED BAG OF INDIVIDUAL BELIEVERS, FENCE RIDERS, THE ADVANTAGE TAKERS THAT THINK THEY HAVE A FENCE TO RIDE AND THE MEN WHO CHOOSE EVIL. THE KNOWLEDGE WE KNOW WE’VE LOST WE WERE NEVER SUPPOSED TO HAVE. OUR TEACHERS WERE THE FALLEN ANGELS. I SENSE SOME SATISFACTION IN NOT KNOWING WHAT I KNOW I COULD KNOW. KNOWLEDGE IS GOOD, EDUCATION IS GREAT YOU JUST GOTTA EDUCATE YOURSELF WITH THE NECESSARY THINGS FOR YOUR LIFE AND TO WORSHIP OUR LORD GOD, AND LIVING AND LOVING TOGETHER.

  8. Albert F. says:

    Thanks for the report.

    Several commenters in the August 2017 post mentioned the ketogenic diet. It’s a recognized treatment for epilepsy:
    https://charliefoundation.org/keto-for-epilepsy/

  9. EngTiang says:

    Go on a ketogenic diet Graham as a long term solution for your epilepsy…
    It’s a known natural cure for that and has been prescribed and practised since 1921. Dr. Otto Warburg. Google Charlie Foundation.

    https://charliefoundation.org

    Best wishes to you and family with lots of loves!

    ET

  10. Scott Smith says:

    Hi Graham

    Maybe this resonates with you regarding your health.

    You should check out the reviews of this book on amazon and then obviously check with your docs if it’s suitable for you. This basically removes blockages in your bike ducts and enables your body heal itself. I am an aya user and believe she sent me this book. You don’t really need to buy the book as there is enough info on the web

    “The amazing liver and gallbladder flush” by Andreas Moritz

    Love your work, we need you to be well
    All the best
    Scott

  11. Michael Stenmark says:

    Dear Graham.
    Hope you are well.

    I guess, you are already asking yourself, what is the price and is it worth it?
    Is it a necessity to have a clear and open gate to Mother Ayahuasca? .. and risk your life?
    Should you make sure you can stay a good husband and father and friend for others?
    Does it rest upon your shoulders to, as close as possible achievable, sum your findings and theories that you have not yet formulated for reasons such as waiting until they are strengthen by profs of facts or just because lack of time.

    I wonder, have you given a thought on the possibility of more than one gate. As I am aware of the fact that the Ayahuasca is a brew totally unique and the product of just a few ingredients out of thousands of possible components, still I personally think it is just a product with a local character.
    I have a hard time believing that any shamanistic rite in Japan would face a Jaguar or that the Same-people of my own northern mountains would ever do. My own regions dreamland share figures and mystical entities of other kinds. But we all see and share the same experience here in a way that mimics the way the Ayahuasca brings visions or experience of the same kind to many users.

    I think that this dreamworld is just dressed up so that we can recognize our selves based on our knowledge and reference points. The Jaguar as an avatar for a deity would have meant nothing or little back in the days before the media world of today, to the shamans of the old Scandinavia.

    I believe that Every dream landscape or channel to the realm of the gods or goddess, has its own regional way of being rendered in the traveller’s mind. Little like a computer game could very well have different skins (that is the thermology) or texture or shader of any avatar or object in the game (my trade is game maker since 30 years back.
    Why should it not be that way!? We all need reference points. What use would it be if the gods or entities showed themselves or the messages in graphical dresses that we could not recognise?
    It´s like a computer game, just endlessly more complex.

    And I am sure that you know and are aware of this.
    In my mind, as a reflection to your 4 days reports of Ayahuasca, comes to: Maybe one door is closed – still many more are open. There are many ways of traveling “there”.
    What is the real goal.. to always be inside the door? That door?
    Or be able to reconnect in memories or through other doors?
    I would think of friends and family first.

    / Michael Stenmark

  12. William Takeda says:

    Mr.Hancock the Sharp and clear definition you discribe the way our society is modeled and this urge for the shift that may lead us toward a real single Earth fraternity is an elementary and wise issue that all awakened person should be commited to wide spread.

    I Wonder when you may come to give lectures um Brazil?

    A Hug!

  13. Jordan says:

    You are a major inspiration Mister Hancock! I am grateful for all the knowledge that you keep sharing with the world and I want to thank you for helping me realize that there is something wrong with the society. Your books and lectures have impacted my life so much that I’m going to Colombia in March or April to the Amazon to find a shaman an drink the sacred brew. I was wondering if you know or would recommend any Colombian shaman to facilitate the journey in the jungle. Mad respect for you. Always

  14. Mark Haywood says:

    Graham- So right you are about all of humanity being one tree. Out here in the desert I had an illumination of my own and wrote up a list of reasons for destroying the immigration barriers between nation’s. If you would like to see it I will send it. Mark Haywood

  15. Michael Vogelsang says:

    It’s always nice to hear about your experiences Graham. You are always so generous with your sharing. Thank you. I hope you get some more clarity soon about your healing at Rythmia with the medicine.
    Always looking forward to your offerings.
    Bless you,
    Michael

  16. Stefan Mihai says:

    I love you Graham … you are a great master! Thank you!

  17. Vern L says:

    This is brilliant… hope you have your finances squared away for your family. You’re on the anticonvulsants for THEM too, you know?

  18. michael morley says:

    Thank you Graham.Well said sir.Please continue to do this fine work.So appreciated!!!

  19. Erica says:

    I’m also going to voice loving concern about your meds. I’m not lecturing, and I understand your yearning to…. “level up” in a spiritual sense. But spirit is boundless and limitless and could surely direct you on how to reach new heights/depths in a way that’s both safe and cosmically awesome. May you be divinely guided and very happy.thank you for sharing! 💕🤙

  20. Gigi says:

    I honor your work, adore your words and miss Ayahuasca. I was able to receive the medicine here in the states a few years back with amazing shaman and facilitators. It was quite pricey, so I am not able to experience it as often as I would like. I am grateful to be able to share your experiences with you.

  21. charles m soukup says:

    Beware The New Age.

  22. Rogier Buurman says:

    Thanks for writing your experience. Travelled with Ayahuasca 9 times and after the second started teaching myself how to work with the plants. My interpretation is that the visions disappear because you’re travelling beyond that which can be ‘known’ by the (conscious)brain. On the other hand, by now you, if you live in accordance with the plants teachings, you do no need it anymore. The answers will present itself from within os as som type of synchronicity on the outside. Spinoza would call that intuition. Knowing, which is possible when there is a healthy self awareness/ loving. Your former friend the Canabis plant can help you there. hahaha, sorry. If this makes sense, great. If anyone thinks I am crazy. You are not the first nor the last.

  23. John Moody says:

    In counterpoint to Graham’s call for everybody to get along, respect each other and not be divided by artificial barriers etc. it seems to me that part of the problem is technology. For all the good it has done for improving the standard of living, it is advancing at a pace that seems a bit like a runaway train. Also the question of diversity. If we are to becoming a vast global melting pot, as seems to be the globalists plan for us, what is going to happen to culture among peoples? Also of concern is the disparity in population growth between the developed world and the third world. Is migration the answer or is it the responsibility of those having five kids to a family when they get here to have less children? The planet has limited resources and if we are to get along, respect needs to be a two way street. These are difficult issues that are transforming the globe at a pace that is not tenable – as I say, a bit like a runaway train.

  24. Lissen Seligmann says:

    Saw the JRE of 2016 with R. Carlson the other day. We are ascending from collective depths of trauma right NOW, so you are doing fabulous and needed work for Earth and humankind. – My hyper-spiritual daughter Eva died age 33 from effects of grand mals, could not be kept free of seizures with medication – as a naturopath, clairvoyant, healer I tried everything else known then before that. And meds DID eat her brains. Cannabis, natural and efficient, could be a novel alternative, by the way. But, try the suggestions above. A lot has happened since Eva. Time, among other things. We are approaching higher frequencies, good for you. However, being incarnated was never a natural state for the spirit. It fights to get free from born. The solution is oneness with I AM, the soul, while living. So, what are the obstacles? 2017 was a break-away-year, from anything out-dated… even with what we think is our chosen duty. Love from Lissen http://www.lissen-seligmann.dk

  25. Lissen Seligmann says:

    NB! If your soul decides finito, it shakes you free of all obligations, whatever great work for humankind. And, it is the strongest! Humanness is not the final answer. Mastery is. Your death-experience – the black panther, the mystical Mother, is also a predator, destructor. Dying living is no doubt your next step, ascension. All of my very spiritual family have been going through that since shortly before 2000. Having lived until now, you will surely survive! <3<3<3

  26. Shannon Gronich says:

    wow! I am so grateful I have found you. Thank you for taking time to write and share. I started having seizures at the age of 5 and at the age of 24 they stopped after meeting and working with one of my spiritual teachers, Jim Self. His insights to the root cause and my inner work, was mind blowing. I trust you will find your inner guide with this. Here in service if you ever need support.

  27. J Gendron says:

    Hi Graham, thank you for all this incredible work you’ve been doing. What I am about to say isn’t really related to your article, but I was watching recently a Joe Rogan podcast where you debate with Randal and Micheal, and somewhere during the 3 hours video, you guys talk about Atlantis…. did you see what this YT Channel found about Atlantis? Don’t you think it would be worth to look at this discovery? Thank you for reading my comment and looking at this file which I consider important… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5kEzxOb-3c

  28. Suzanne Taylor says:

    This is a beautiful call to intelligence, Graham. You continue to be one of the most compelling heroes of our time.

  29. Lissen Seligmann says:

    Shannon is very, very right about Jim Self. Crimsoncircle is also safe, by the way. No religious crap, no strings attached. And, like Shannon, I am also here for you.

  30. daniel moru says:

    Hello Graham, thanks for these deeply interesting words. One point I may say something about is about death, usually I speak from my own experiences but here I equally bring some of J Krishnamurti into this matter, you may have read about that I guess..Of course there is death of the body , as such a “simple” matter, psychologically a tough one.
    May we put aside the physical aspect of it.
    K sometimes was mentioning “dying to the known”, this known as I see that, being the world of the analytical process we call thought. Thought can only analyze the known, not all the known, but its own known , some of it, it can be a lot , is biased by personal coloring, desires, fears, hopes, limitations etc The known can of course be past for a micro second , but still it is recorded then I watch my movie and analyses it…not going too much into that here, not the main point.
    Psychological death is the freedom from such known. As far as I know having lived that is that it cannot be reached, this simply means that thought has no place in such matter….
    Our other capacities have…I know some by experiences .
    Death , psychological may be now freedom from thought dictatorship on the brain like it does on the planet…all what I myself have experimented was out of the blue by having properly lived suffering, it does not need to be up to the roof..to cut the crap to do that, without of course searching for any result that is an apparently paradoxical key, to do that one have one single option, to be the pain…then as they wish, some of our other capacities may turn themselves on….

    well that is all for now..

    All the best to you from Ireland…

  31. phyliss says:

    Mr Hancock
    Thank you for being here on Earth, for the light you shine. May you be filled with infinite light,divine love, never end peace and deep healing.

  32. Vickie Bazaldua says:

    I just sat until 4:30 in the morning watching about 15 videos on you tube. I go to work in 2 hours. But you know what, I don’t care!! It was worth every minute! I will be purchasing your books after my nap before work lol. When are you coming to the US?!!!! Thank you for all the work you do. Since a child, I felt it in my GUT that everything I was being told was some version of the truth or fabrication of it. Your videos let me know I wasn’t the only one.

  33. diamond says:

    Graham,
    I know you’ve had a history with pot. There are certain strains grown with very low THC however a high level of CBD. Charlotte’s web is a strand that was made specifically for children that suffer from series seizures daily. You can take the oil orally and this will not conflict with the mother. Feel free to e-mail me for some techniques in working with the medicine. And I wish you a perfect bill of health.

    -Diamond

  34. Emmett Perry Whisenhunt says:

    Grahm your migraines may be subdued with very small dose extracted pure psylocibin/psylocin x3 daily. It acts similar to a tryptophan but is entirely of another nature chemically. Dmt x2 daily would most assuredly work. It would make life enjoyable. However, missing a dose or 3 might kill you.

  35. David Anderson says:

    Graham,
    Your message is very moving, although never having taken psychedelic drugs (apart from alcohol), I have no personal experience of much of what you have written. Instead, I am one who dreams a great deal during normal sleep, and I suspect much psychedelic experience is unlocking truths and ideas normally found as our subconscious tries to sort things out when dreaming. But I greatly appreciate your contributions to unravelling our hidden and indeed deliberately suppressed prehistoric past, as well as the mechanisms whereby our planet is more than ever being willfully destroyed. For me, the truth begins with recognising that our species is a part of nature for whom understanding the past is an essential element in controlling the future. I particularly appreciate your persistence in debunking officially sanctioned pseudoscientific ‘expert’ archeological and geological doctrine. Meanwhile, please keep taking the anticonvulsants! And make sure you visit Amelia in the near future.

  36. Lazaro Isidoro says:

    Graham,
    I hope this comment finds you well. I really admire your work and all that you do for the information you provide for the masses. So that we can finally “wake up” from this long nap we have been taking. We are long overdue to finally realize what our main purpose is here on earth as humanity. To heal our planet, love one another, show compassion towards our fellow global neighbors, learn as much as possible from this journey we all share called life. The day we understand who we really are, this place we call home will have a major transformation and we will finally be able to ascend into our next stepping stone in this evolutionary spiritual journey. What we seem to lack is unity as humanity, and we allow all these divisions to keep us in a constant “us vs them” mentality. Not knowing that we are only slowing our progress towards enlightenment. Our ancestors seemed to know so much knowledge despite having less resources than the ones we currently have the privileged to enjoy. And despite of all of this advantage we focus on the wrong things in life. We feed so much into our ego and pride that we have developed amnesia into the messages that were left behind by earlier civilizations. It’s no surprise to anyone about organizations out there trying to suppress and keep hidden information from ever seeing daylight. But that should never stop us from searching and looking for answers. Curiosity is what got us out of the caves and helped us evolve into who we are today. We are all one and we can do so much together if we could all just find a middle ground where we can agree for the greater good of humanity.

    Take care Graham blessings to you and your family!!

  37. Adam says:

    Graham,
    I urge you to please look into Dr. Robert Morse’s teachings. He is truly a worker of love and light and an extremely important soul to have on this planet. He has worked out the cause of disease in accord with an acidic diet and congestion of the human body’s lymphatic/sewer system. All of your health issues including seizures and cancer are fully reversible if you understand what is causing the problem and how to reverse it. Robertmorsend on youtube is where all of his information is at. I hope this message finds you brother.

  38. Ras says:

    Dear Graham, sad to hear you have had problems with seizures and had to revert to modern day snake Keppra. You have already gotten a few tips. Allow me to add one: CBD. High cannabidiol hemp will to some extent repair your nervous system. We used to manufacture organic from highest altitude in Europe. Happy to send you a sample or supply if needed. We switched to spagyric manufacturing this year but couldnt commercialise it as prices broke the higher end market. BTW the synergy between high % cannabidiol hemp and ordinary high THC cannabis is another mind blowing feature. Be Well!

  39. Thomas says:

    I too would like to recommend CBD oil for your ailments. There has been overwhelming success with seizures, Parkinson’s, M. S. , and Cancers taking highly concentrated CBD oil orally. Rick Simpson and Phoenix Tears are excellent resources for applications, and research. Best wishes for 2019 !

  40. Rafal says:

    Dear Mr Hanckock,

    Thank you! Your work is an inspiration for me.
    We are partly our choices and I believe that you’ve made a reasonable choice around your health and the experience you want to exploit.

    Hope to shake hand with you someday.
    Keep on going.

    -Rafal

  41. Tom Doss III says:

    Mr. Hancock, have you published anything (or made a utube presentation) with a mention of the recent impact crater
    found in northern Greenland? It’s thought to be a very young crater and may be possibly be proof of
    an impact initiating the Younger Drias period. With a crater diameter of 19 miles, it, with other fragments landing on the North American ice sheet would have caused massive destruction world wide.

  42. Bob says:

    Graham, try CBD. It’s the non-psychoactive type of cannibinoids. CBD turned my daughter’s seizures off like a light switch with no side effects.

  43. Anna Schneidervin says:

    Dr. Hancock,

    I just finished your underwater civilization book, the first of your books I have read; won’t be the last😃.
    Thank you for your work! Fascinating, solid information.

    I was struck personally by your migraine experiences.

    I wondered if you were an epileptic; epileptic and multiple sclerosis patients have higher rates of migraines; also people who have survived carbon monoxide poisoning. And,—just read you do have seizures.
    Ive lived with nearly lifetime migraines; also have MS. I have a medical background.

    The above-mentioned responses to advocating the diet absolutely will help you.
    Books to help you understand ketogenic diet include: Dr. Mary Newports on Alzheimers Disease (Alzheimers: What if there was a cure and no one knew?) Also the books The Obesity Code/The Diabetic Code ( the same doctor wrote both).
    Please feel free to contact me by email, if you wish, for more migraine information.

    I am familiar with the Imatrex you described taking while diving. With your seizures, however it sounds as if you would benefit from gabapentin.

    Gaba itself is a natural neurotransmitter, though you need pharmaceutical version Gabapentin, not just the gaba available OTC. It comes in 300 mg. capsules. Brand name Neurontin; raises seizure\pain threshold. Extremely efficacious for migraines,first prescribed to me by my MS neurologist as a safer medication than some of the others.

    Please be cautious with the drug you are trying Ayahuasc.
    It can raise blood pressure levels precipitously and therefore cause strokes. You probably are aware of this but with your predisposition toward seizures and migraines you need to understand it has some very real dangers involved.

    Ayahuasca has been used anecdotally as an antidepressant.

    There is also a book by a psychiatrist who used it in some research; though the name of the book escapes me for the moment.

    However,recent research using low-dose ketamine dispened IV for patients with severe, drug-resistant depressions may be a better alternative.

    It is hospital-administered by your doctor and it appears to be highly effective at relieving the depression, without a subsequent return of symptoms.
    There is not a blood pressure issue as in ayahuasca.
    A spiritual experience occurs during the ketamine administration and is found to be integral to treating and resolving the patients depression.
    Interestingly, if the dose gradient is too low to induce the psychotropic aspect (spiritual experience involving memory of last traumatic events) then the treatment is not effective.

    Therefore, the hospital administration of carefully graduated amounts and the continual monitoring of the patient during the entire procedure is required. I

    The doctor attends the entire process: asks questions to address unresolved issues and keep the patients focused. There appears to be as much a psychological as a physiological\chemical aspect involved to this highly unusual although seemingly-effective treatment for severe, mono-polar, drug-resistant depression.I
    Thought this might be some helpful information to peruse if you had the interest in drugs such as ayahuasca.
    All the best,
    Anna

  44. Allen Brown says:

    Hello Graham, We are vacationing in Peru later this year. Is the a facility that you can recommend for a ayahuasca journey?

  45. bruce says:

    hey man, hope ur doing well! just wanna say thank u for what u have been doing! since i came across your work, everything change in my life! just hope some day i can give u a big hug! 🙂 sending good thoughts to u brother ! 🙏

  46. Kerrick says:

    Love ya Graham. Thank you for sharing

  47. Marc Luchs says:

    I’m a big fan. As a Classical Chinese Medicine person, I believe a skilled practitioner could use herbs to work with your circumstances. Herbal medicine would most likely not hinder your connection to Ayahuasca. It’s most likely a gift, your epilepsy. Easily said, I know. If epilepsy is one of the old signs/processes of auto-initiation for a healer, perhaps this is an invitation.

    Not to lose you, but very simply put, at the cellular level, oxygen is love. Cancer is a process that thrives on the absence of Oxygen/love. The site of a growing cancer is indicative of a physical/emotional place in oneself where one might learn to direct more love.

    Most of us have the seeds of cancer in us all of our lives. An openhearted approach to life is the surest means of oxygenating the darkest corners in our psychosomatic selves. Cancer is a word, not a sentence.

    If your epilepsy meds are blocking your connection to spirit, then they are definitely promoting cancer. Either directly, or indirectly in that they are blocking insight into deeper healing.

    Wishing you and your family well.

  48. Robin says:

    Dear Graham,

    Having worked intensively with Psilocybe mushrooms for the past 44 years and also having had the chance to work with ayahuasca, I can conclusively state that the Little Saints can offer a deeper healing experience and your anticonvulsant medication will not get in the way of the force they carry. Approaching them in the manner following the traditional Mazatec velada, focusing intention on the altar and a candle flame, one learns to ride the trance like a horse. The practice of lying down and listening to music is the lazy way of working with the mushrooms, according to Natalia Martinez, who is featured in the documentary by Oliver Quintanilla, Little Saints: Eat a Mushroom, Talk to God (http://littlesaintsmovie.com). Work is currently underway to create the opportunity to go to Huatla de Jimenez and participate in a velada guided by Natalia. Stay tuned.

  49. CROYDON L KEMP says:

    Graham: I would trust the word of the Jaguar. I sense it has a message for you now that you need to know.

    ck

  50. ariyan paydar says:

    hello graham
    i am an admirer of you work.
    i would like to ask you because i have no other source to ask this to.
    how does one get in touch with a shaman and find one?
    and i would like to thank you for the time you dedicate to your work
    may the spirit of those enlightened by you be your be your strength in life

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