back to the story if you missed the previous chapters
go scan down the posts a little bit.
our hero Oziris, cloned repeatedly throughout history by his sister Isis till he finally escaped our mundane dimension via an astral gate he built in the middle of the mayan complex of chichan itza (whew!) , immortalized as both quetzalcoatl, viracocha, and Lord Pacal, arrived on the planet Kolob circling the dark star sirius B and started to party with all his old buddies. However, his pleasure was to be short lived.
Turns out his sister Isis had stolen some of his supersperm and impregnated via artificial insemination this one Hebrew princess... what was her name... hmmm... could it be.... Mary?.... The resultant offspring who shall go unnamed for now wandered into Egypt in his 21st year and took up residence at a little mountain temple whose exact location is known only to a Chosen Few... following a course of study that required him to subsist on a diet of moldy cheetos, raw shrimp, and goat cheese our Divine Progeny learned the secrets of the mighty Qabalistic Tree of Life and the Underlying Mathematical Matrix that is, of course, at the heart of everything as we know it. This Divine Persona took it upon himself to carry the Sins Of The World , which, when you know levitation isn't really all that big a deal anyway, - wandered back into Israel at the age of 32 and began teaching everyone to eat unseasoned fish and be thankful for it- plus get drunk every Saturday and have a roaring good time.
Unfortunately for Our Hero Osiris, caught in a transdimensional time warp due to the evil manipulation of the space time continuum by his half brother Kukulcan , he could do nothing but watch as His Divine Progeny proceeded to get stoned, flayed and crucified.
Luckily His Supersperm gave the Divine Progeny Superstrength, allowing him to survive the Crucifixion and stumble out of the cave of his tomb three days later (imagine that!) , and flee the infidel Romans to Northern France with his wife Mary and a few close friends, after of course securing the safety of the Ark of the Covenant in Ethiopia where it remains to this day, giving off radioactive cancer to whichever unlucky priest is Chosen to watch it.
Osiris, meanwhile, trapped in the transdimensional flux by Kukulcan after a long night partying on Kolob playing Find the Pearl of Great Price , managed to convince his buddy Oannes to resume his Discordian escapades and enlighten the Dogon as to the true nature of existence and so forth. Unfortunately No One believed the Dogon and that is why, to this day, you can only buy hot dogs in America in packs of 8, but hot dog buns only in packs of 6.
more to come!!! stay tuned!!! Osiris returns to 5th Century England after escaping Kukulcan's web of destruction!
|grand theory part 3||447||oziris||30-Nov-00 01:37|
|RE: grand theory part 3||203||Geoff Stocks||30-Nov-00 01:45|
|RE: grand theory part 3||199||Axxe||30-Nov-00 01:59|
|RE: grand theory part 3||230||MArk Chan||30-Nov-00 02:49|
|RE: grand theory part 3||210||laura||30-Nov-00 09:45|
|RE: grand theory part 3||201||Geoff Stocks||30-Nov-00 19:21|
|RE: grand theory part 3||179||MArk Chan||30-Nov-00 23:30|
|RE: grand theory part 3||204||Geoff Stocks||01-Dec-00 02:15|
|RE: grand theory part 3||194||Fuzzy||30-Nov-00 15:09|
|RE: grand theory part 3||168||Vince||01-Dec-00 01:55|
|RE: grand theory part 3||220||Vince||01-Dec-00 01:58|
|RE: grand theory part 3||201||laura||01-Dec-00 09:32|
|Talk about a brazen devil?||193||William John Meegan||01-Dec-00 01:31|
|RE: Talk about a brazen devil?||225||Vince||01-Dec-00 01:52|
|RE: Talk about a brazen devil?||231||Geoff Stocks||01-Dec-00 02:22|
|RE: Talk about a brazen devil?||250||Stalker?||01-Dec-00 13:05|
|RE: Talk about a brazen devil?||255||Geoff Stocks||01-Dec-00 19:17|