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Man U manager sent scouts out around the world looking for a new striker.
One of the scouts informs him of a young Iraqi striker who he thinks will turn out to be a superstar.
Jose flies to Baghdad to watch him and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come
over to Manchester. Two weeks later Man.U are 4-0 down against Man. City with only 20 minutes
left to play. Jose gives the young Iraqi striker the nod and on he goes.
The lad is a sensation, scores 5 in 20 minutes and wins the game for United.
The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star.

When the player comes off the pitch he phones his Mum to tell her about his first day in English football.
"Hello Mum, guess what?" he says, "I played for 20 minutes today. We were 4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won.
Everyone loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me." "Wonderful," says his Mum, "Let me tell you about my day.
Your father got shot in the street, your sister and I were ambushed and beaten, and your brother has joined a gang of looters whilst you were having a good time”

The young lad is very upset, “what can I say Mum, I’m SO sorry”

“SORRY”, says his mum. “It’s your fault we moved to Manchester in the first place.

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Joke Of The Day! 13832 Brian Patterson 19-Feb-16 17:04
Re: Joke Of The Day! 979 molder 22-Feb-16 11:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 451 molder 12-May-18 11:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 1000 Brian Patterson 22-Feb-16 20:16
Re: Joke Of The Day! 1081 molder 23-Feb-16 04:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 930 michael seabrook 22-Feb-16 22:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 920 molder 23-Feb-16 04:13
Re: Joke Of The Day! 1008 Brian Patterson 23-Feb-16 16:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 1019 Nolondil 22-Feb-16 23:01
Re: Joke Of The Day! 988 Sirfiroth 22-Feb-16 23:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 949 molder 26-Feb-16 04:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 723 molder 31-Mar-17 06:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 811 Brian Patterson 31-Mar-17 16:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 922 carolb 26-Feb-16 12:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 1016 Brian Patterson 01-Mar-16 23:38
Re: Joke Of The Day! 908 michael seabrook 07-Mar-16 18:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 910 michael seabrook 10-Mar-16 22:45
Re: Joke Of The Day! 956 Brian Patterson 10-Mar-16 23:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 997 Poster Boy 13-Mar-16 00:25
Re: Joke Of The Day! 1006 Brian Patterson 21-Mar-16 15:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 920 michael seabrook 21-Mar-16 16:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 955 michael seabrook 21-Mar-16 17:12
Re: Joke Of The Day! 985 molder 22-Mar-16 06:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 981 molder 24-Mar-16 04:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 927 michael seabrook 27-Mar-16 00:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 958 molder 29-Mar-16 06:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 936 molder 02-Apr-16 10:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 903 michael seabrook 02-Apr-16 12:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 916 molder 07-Apr-16 09:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 812 Eddie Larry 08-Apr-16 03:22
Re: Joke Of The Day! 883 molder 08-Apr-16 06:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 855 Brian Patterson 08-Apr-16 18:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 839 molder 13-Apr-16 04:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 873 molder 19-Apr-16 12:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 995 molder 10-May-16 11:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 908 molder 18-Jun-16 06:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 795 Brian Patterson 18-Jun-16 14:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 872 molder 21-Jun-16 05:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 906 molder 01-Jul-16 07:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 790 michael seabrook 02-Jul-16 17:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 790 molder 12-Jul-16 04:53
Jokes for seniors - not PC 920 Eddie Larry 29-Jul-16 01:17
Re: Jokes for seniors - not PC 783 Eddie Larry 29-Jul-16 01:19
Re: Jokes for seniors - not PC 773 molder 29-Jul-16 05:46
Re: Jokes for seniors - not PC 762 Eddie Larry 29-Jul-16 14:27
Re: Joke Of The Day! 776 molder 05-Aug-16 05:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 797 Brian Patterson 05-Aug-16 16:23
Boudreaux from Thibodeaux 826 Dr. Troglodyte 08-Aug-16 21:39
Re: Boudreaux from Thibodeaux 786 molder 09-Aug-16 11:32
Re: Joke Of The Day!-Redneck Humor 780 Brian Patterson 09-Aug-16 18:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 731 michael seabrook 10-Aug-16 20:21
Two Candidates Go Into a Bakery on the Campaign Trail… 852 Dr. Troglodyte 13-Aug-16 18:58
Re: Joke Of The Day! 888 molder 19-Aug-16 03:43
Re: Joke Of The Day! 681 Brian Patterson 22-Aug-16 15:39
Re: Joke Of The Day! 815 molder 22-Aug-16 23:56
May I Play Through? 786 Dr. Troglodyte 22-Aug-16 15:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 806 Sirfiroth 25-Aug-16 13:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 700 molder 26-Aug-16 05:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 741 molder 26-Aug-16 07:07
Re: Joke Of The Day! 876 brett z 29-Aug-16 22:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 779 molder 06-Sep-16 03:33
Getting Some 887 randompHactor 09-Sep-16 19:21
Re: Getting Some 826 molder 16-Sep-16 05:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 837 Thanos5150 19-Sep-16 05:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 734 Brian Patterson 20-Sep-16 21:58
Re: Joke Of The Day! 735 molder 23-Sep-16 05:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 833 molder 30-Sep-16 07:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 777 Sirfiroth 03-Oct-16 23:36
Re: Joke Of The Day! 887 molder 07-Oct-16 03:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 809 molder 21-Oct-16 09:46
Re: Joke Of The Day! 670 molder 04-Nov-16 11:36
Re: Joke Of The Day! 736 Brian Patterson 04-Nov-16 15:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 812 molder 04-Nov-16 20:52
Squat 814 randompHactor 08-Nov-16 06:06
Re: Squat 704 molder 08-Nov-16 09:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 843 aurora 09-Nov-16 17:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 704 Brian Patterson 10-Nov-16 18:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 724 aurora 10-Nov-16 18:18
Re: Joke Of The Day! 744 randompHactor 10-Nov-16 18:26
Re: Joke Of The Day! 583 Brian Patterson 10-Nov-16 19:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 649 molder 11-Nov-16 06:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 651 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 04:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 622 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 05:53
Re: Joke Of The Day! 757 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 05:53
Re: Joke Of The Day! 813 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 07:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 677 Aeschylus 13-Nov-16 06:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 773 molder 13-Nov-16 13:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 713 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 07:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 732 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 08:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 640 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 08:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 668 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 08:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 672 Brian Patterson 15-Nov-16 17:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 802 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 04:42
Re: Joke Of The Day! 650 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:34
Re: Joke Of The Day! 668 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 05:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 624 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 731 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 669 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 695 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 05:58
Re: Joke Of The Day! 774 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 05:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 744 aurora 18-Nov-16 06:04
Re: Joke Of The Day! 836 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 07:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 787 Aeschylus 19-Nov-16 00:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 749 Aeschylus 20-Nov-16 22:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 701 Aeschylus 22-Nov-16 06:41
Re: Joke Of The Day! 781 Eddie Larry 26-Nov-16 04:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 700 molder 26-Nov-16 07:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 719 Eddie Larry 26-Nov-16 05:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 760 Sirfiroth 01-Dec-16 16:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 722 molder 02-Dec-16 11:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 724 molder 06-Dec-16 04:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 717 molder 13-Dec-16 04:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 708 Brian Patterson 13-Dec-16 16:22
Re: Joke Of The Day! 824 molder 23-Dec-16 06:40
Joke Of The Day! 668 Dr. Troglodyte 24-Dec-16 20:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 708 molder 27-Dec-16 09:49
Chessnuts 870 randompHactor 27-Dec-16 15:34
Wheelbarrow Man 772 randompHactor 26-Jan-17 21:25
Re: Wheelbarrow Man 704 molder 27-Jan-17 03:30
Re: Wheelbarrow Man 872 Brian Patterson 28-Jan-17 21:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 815 molder 07-Feb-17 22:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 696 Brian Patterson 08-Feb-17 17:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 784 michael seabrook 12-Feb-17 00:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 830 molder 16-Feb-17 04:09
Re: Joke Of The Day! 812 Eddie Larry 26-Feb-17 03:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 801 carolb 01-Mar-17 01:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 759 Eddie Larry 01-Mar-17 19:45
Re: Joke Of The Day! 658 carolb 01-Mar-17 20:14
Re: Joke Of The Day! 784 Eddie Larry 02-Mar-17 22:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 705 carolb 02-Mar-17 22:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 648 michael seabrook 05-Mar-17 22:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 762 carolb 05-Mar-17 23:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 659 michael seabrook 11-Mar-17 23:26
Re: Joke Of The Day! 745 carolb 11-Mar-17 23:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 622 randompHactor 12-Mar-17 00:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 715 carolb 12-Mar-17 00:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 735 michael seabrook 12-Mar-17 07:16
Re: Joke Of The Day! 671 carolb 12-Mar-17 13:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 632 michael seabrook 12-Mar-17 20:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 663 carolb 12-Mar-17 21:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 664 randompHactor 12-Mar-17 21:27
Re: Joke Of The Day! 681 michael seabrook 21-Mar-17 14:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 739 carolb 11-Mar-17 23:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 669 molder 03-Mar-17 03:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 710 molder 10-Mar-17 02:24
Re: Joke Of The Day! 757 Brian Patterson 10-Mar-17 16:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 743 molder 21-Mar-17 08:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 673 michael seabrook 25-Mar-17 08:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 817 molder 04-Apr-17 02:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 764 molder 21-Apr-17 03:02
Re: Joke Of The Day! 673 Archaic 21-Apr-17 22:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 534 molder 24-Apr-17 04:37
Did you hear about the Doctor on the United Flight? 899 Archaic 24-Apr-17 10:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 589 Brian Patterson 24-Apr-17 14:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 624 molder 25-Apr-17 05:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 809 molder 02-May-17 10:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 707 Brian Patterson 02-May-17 23:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 738 molder 09-May-17 02:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 643 AstralDruid 17-May-17 06:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 649 michael seabrook 17-May-17 21:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 566 Brian Patterson 22-May-17 18:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! How to make a bad mistake 547 molder 23-May-17 11:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 678 molder 24-May-17 01:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 627 molder 27-May-17 11:05
Karma - angry ole' geezer gets his come-uppance! 654 carolb 30-May-17 19:42
Re: Joke Of The Day! 659 Dr. Troglodyte 06-Jun-17 16:18
Re: Joke Of The Day! 590 Brian Patterson 06-Jun-17 22:25
Re: Joke Of The Day! 686 molder 09-Jun-17 03:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 688 molder 20-Jun-17 01:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 596 Brian Patterson 22-Jun-17 20:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 493 molder 22-Jun-17 22:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 516 Sirfiroth 23-Jun-17 02:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 741 molder 23-Jun-17 03:27
Re: Joke Of The Day! 627 molder 30-Jun-17 03:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 592 Brian Patterson 30-Jun-17 18:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 576 Deep1 02-Jul-17 07:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 503 Brian Patterson 04-Jul-17 15:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 608 molder 14-Jul-17 04:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 562 Brian Patterson 14-Jul-17 17:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 642 molder 21-Jul-17 05:26
Re: Joke Of The Day! 484 Brian Patterson 25-Jul-17 16:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 567 muppedo 26-Jul-17 11:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 655 Brian Patterson 28-Jul-17 14:38
Re: Joke Of The Day! 503 Sirfiroth 28-Jul-17 14:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 607 molder 01-Aug-17 03:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 573 molder 04-Aug-17 03:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 494 Brian Patterson 04-Aug-17 20:01
Re: Joke Of The Day! 533 molder 08-Aug-17 03:24
Re: Joke Of The Day! 490 molder 11-Aug-17 03:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 501 Brian Patterson 15-Aug-17 15:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 506 molder 18-Aug-17 05:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 460 Fsbirdhouse 23-Aug-17 17:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 487 michael seabrook 23-Aug-17 21:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 472 Fsbirdhouse 31-Aug-17 16:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 494 molder 31-Aug-17 16:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 545 Fsbirdhouse 01-Sep-17 04:43
Re: Joke Of The Day! 487 Brian Patterson 01-Sep-17 19:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 482 molder 02-Sep-17 19:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 502 Brian Patterson 05-Sep-17 15:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 581 molder 15-Sep-17 04:43
Re: Joke Of The Day! 487 molder 03-Oct-17 03:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 539 Brian Patterson 03-Oct-17 23:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 531 Fsbirdhouse 09-Oct-17 04:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 520 molder 09-Oct-17 05:36
Re: Joke Of The Day! 467 Brian Patterson 09-Oct-17 18:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 500 molder 06-Oct-17 05:07
Re: Joke Of The Day! 518 Fsbirdhouse 09-Oct-17 05:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 514 molder 10-Oct-17 03:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 459 Brian Patterson 27-Oct-17 14:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 453 Eddie Larry 27-Oct-17 17:45
Re: Joke Of The Day! 490 Brian Patterson 27-Oct-17 18:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 463 molder 21-Nov-17 02:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 448 molder 22-Nov-17 21:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 489 muppedo 25-Nov-17 02:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 499 molder 27-Nov-17 11:19
Re: Joke Of The Day! 458 molder 01-Dec-17 03:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 447 molder 05-Dec-17 04:24
Re: Joke Of The Day! 459 molder 08-Dec-17 03:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 424 molder 11-Dec-17 07:43
Xmas joke 461 drew 13-Dec-17 23:34
Re: Xmas joke 434 michael seabrook 16-Dec-17 07:58
Re: Xmas joke 449 drew 18-Dec-17 00:32
Christmas Joke 428 carolb 18-Dec-17 23:37
Re: Christmas Joke 431 molder 19-Dec-17 04:25
Re: Joke Of The Day! 447 molder 15-Dec-17 03:33
New Job in Chicago 427 Dr. Troglodyte 18-Dec-17 17:01
Re: Joke Of The Day! 430 molder 28-Dec-17 03:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 430 molder 29-Dec-17 00:05
The Two Friends 431 Dr. Troglodyte 31-Dec-17 17:19
Re: Joke Of The Day! 433 molder 03-Jan-18 04:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 447 molder 12-Jan-18 04:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 413 molder 30-Jan-18 03:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 493 molder 02-Feb-18 04:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 484 molder 23-Feb-18 22:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 415 molder 16-Mar-18 04:42
Re: Joke Of The Day! 401 Brian Patterson 16-Mar-18 20:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 441 molder 17-Mar-18 13:04
Re: Joke Of The Day! 426 molder 24-Apr-18 03:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 404 molder 01-May-18 03:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 408 molder 04-May-18 03:39
Re: Joke Of The Day! 393 molder 11-May-18 04:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 381 molder 25-May-18 04:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 381 molder 30-May-18 11:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 380 molder 08-Jun-18 03:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 375 molder 12-Jun-18 04:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 375 molder 23-Jun-18 00:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 329 molder 17-Aug-18 04:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 334 molder 21-Aug-18 04:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 342 molder 25-Sep-18 10:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 345 molder 05-Oct-18 04:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 356 Brian Patterson 06-Oct-18 03:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 318 molder 19-Oct-18 04:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 265 molder 04-Dec-18 10:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 293 molder 08-Dec-18 05:14
Re: Joke Of The Day! 228 molder 18-Jan-19 04:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 214 molder 05-Feb-19 11:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 203 Sirfiroth 07-Feb-19 17:29
Ed’s Deathbed Bequest 193 Dr. Troglodyte 12-Feb-19 18:40
WHAT IF ??? 193 Dr. Troglodyte 13-Feb-19 23:55
Re: WHAT IF ??? 188 molder 15-Feb-19 11:28
Rodney Dangerfield on Carson: 6 mins 208 Poster Boy 15-Feb-19 23:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 194 molder 08-Mar-19 11:46
Re: Joke Of The Day! 192 molder 12-Apr-19 05:12
Re: Joke Of The Day! 145 molder 18-Apr-19 22:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 135 molder 23-Apr-19 03:53
Re: Joke Of The Day! 169 molder 26-Apr-19 01:01
Re: Joke Of The Day! 101 molder 11-Jun-19 21:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 132 molder 12-Jun-19 10:09
Welding 101 116 Dr. Troglodyte 18-Jun-19 19:48
Re: Welding 101 104 molder 22-Jun-19 11:24
bltch 105 Dr. Troglodyte 05-Jul-19 16:43
You had to be there… 91 Dr. Troglodyte 08-Jul-19 17:54
Awesome! 106 Sirfiroth 08-Jul-19 19:07
Re: Joke Of The Day! 83 molder 16-Jul-19 02:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 110 ldennyjr 26-Jul-19 01:13
Re: Joke Of The Day! 111 Nolondil 27-Jul-19 18:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 65 molder 23-Aug-19 05:07
Re: Joke Of The Day! 55 Eddie Larry 27-Aug-19 23:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 61 molder 30-Aug-19 10:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 43 drew 11-Sep-19 04:28
After All… 31 Dr. Troglodyte 19-Sep-19 15:10
Re: After All… 46 molder 20-Sep-19 12:18
Re: Joke Of The Day! 24 molder 04-Oct-19 05:18
Re: Joke Of The Day! 22 michael seabrook 07-Oct-19 20:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 26 molder 08-Oct-19 11:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 11 Brian Patterson 13-Oct-19 01:46
Re: Joke Of The Day! 10 Brian Patterson 13-Oct-19 01:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 10 molder 13-Oct-19 10:45
Re: Joke Of The Day! 7 Brian Patterson 15-Oct-19 02:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 37 jazzmumbles 08-Oct-19 22:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 11 molder 15-Oct-19 05:03


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