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Man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door.

The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger,

standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!"
He slams the door and returns to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife..
"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers....
"Did you help him?" she asks.
"No, I did not, it's 3 am in the morning and it's bloomin' well pouring with rain out there!"
"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago

when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should

be ashamed of yourself! God loves drunk people too you know."
The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain.
He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"
"Yes," comes back the answer.
"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.
"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.
"Where are you?" asks the husband.
"Over here on the swing," replied the drunk.. HEHE

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Subject Views Written By Posted
Joke Of The Day! 12812 Brian Patterson 19-Feb-16 17:04
Re: Joke Of The Day! 931 molder 22-Feb-16 11:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 400 molder 12-May-18 11:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 957 Brian Patterson 22-Feb-16 20:16
Re: Joke Of The Day! 1036 molder 23-Feb-16 04:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 871 michael seabrook 22-Feb-16 22:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 874 molder 23-Feb-16 04:13
Re: Joke Of The Day! 958 Brian Patterson 23-Feb-16 16:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 973 Nolondil 22-Feb-16 23:01
Re: Joke Of The Day! 940 Sirfiroth 22-Feb-16 23:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 906 molder 26-Feb-16 04:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 674 molder 31-Mar-17 06:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 768 Brian Patterson 31-Mar-17 16:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 879 carolb 26-Feb-16 12:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 978 Brian Patterson 01-Mar-16 23:38
Re: Joke Of The Day! 864 michael seabrook 07-Mar-16 18:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 867 michael seabrook 10-Mar-16 22:45
Re: Joke Of The Day! 911 Brian Patterson 10-Mar-16 23:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 953 Poster Boy 13-Mar-16 00:25
Re: Joke Of The Day! 959 Brian Patterson 21-Mar-16 15:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 878 michael seabrook 21-Mar-16 16:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 916 michael seabrook 21-Mar-16 17:12
Re: Joke Of The Day! 943 molder 22-Mar-16 06:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 937 molder 24-Mar-16 04:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 886 michael seabrook 27-Mar-16 00:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 919 molder 29-Mar-16 06:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 886 molder 02-Apr-16 10:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 864 michael seabrook 02-Apr-16 12:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 877 molder 07-Apr-16 09:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 772 Eddie Larry 08-Apr-16 03:22
Re: Joke Of The Day! 845 molder 08-Apr-16 06:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 814 Brian Patterson 08-Apr-16 18:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 803 molder 13-Apr-16 04:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 832 molder 19-Apr-16 12:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 953 molder 10-May-16 11:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 867 molder 18-Jun-16 06:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 755 Brian Patterson 18-Jun-16 14:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 832 molder 21-Jun-16 05:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 857 molder 01-Jul-16 07:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 754 michael seabrook 02-Jul-16 17:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 749 molder 12-Jul-16 04:53
Jokes for seniors - not PC 875 Eddie Larry 29-Jul-16 01:17
Re: Jokes for seniors - not PC 745 Eddie Larry 29-Jul-16 01:19
Re: Jokes for seniors - not PC 737 molder 29-Jul-16 05:46
Re: Jokes for seniors - not PC 719 Eddie Larry 29-Jul-16 14:27
Re: Joke Of The Day! 737 molder 05-Aug-16 05:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 755 Brian Patterson 05-Aug-16 16:23
Boudreaux from Thibodeaux 782 Dr. Troglodyte 08-Aug-16 21:39
Re: Boudreaux from Thibodeaux 746 molder 09-Aug-16 11:32
Re: Joke Of The Day!-Redneck Humor 736 Brian Patterson 09-Aug-16 18:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 688 michael seabrook 10-Aug-16 20:21
Two Candidates Go Into a Bakery on the Campaign Trail… 807 Dr. Troglodyte 13-Aug-16 18:58
Re: Joke Of The Day! 843 molder 19-Aug-16 03:43
Re: Joke Of The Day! 638 Brian Patterson 22-Aug-16 15:39
Re: Joke Of The Day! 774 molder 22-Aug-16 23:56
May I Play Through? 735 Dr. Troglodyte 22-Aug-16 15:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 767 Sirfiroth 25-Aug-16 13:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 661 molder 26-Aug-16 05:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 694 molder 26-Aug-16 07:07
Re: Joke Of The Day! 835 brett z 29-Aug-16 22:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 735 molder 06-Sep-16 03:33
Getting Some 845 randompHactor 09-Sep-16 19:21
Re: Getting Some 788 molder 16-Sep-16 05:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 779 Thanos5150 19-Sep-16 05:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 693 Brian Patterson 20-Sep-16 21:58
Re: Joke Of The Day! 693 molder 23-Sep-16 05:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 786 molder 30-Sep-16 07:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 731 Sirfiroth 03-Oct-16 23:36
Re: Joke Of The Day! 835 molder 07-Oct-16 03:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 769 molder 21-Oct-16 09:46
Re: Joke Of The Day! 631 molder 04-Nov-16 11:36
Re: Joke Of The Day! 693 Brian Patterson 04-Nov-16 15:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 767 molder 04-Nov-16 20:52
Squat 765 randompHactor 08-Nov-16 06:06
Re: Squat 664 molder 08-Nov-16 09:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 798 aurora 09-Nov-16 17:20
Re: Joke Of The Day! 661 Brian Patterson 10-Nov-16 18:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 685 aurora 10-Nov-16 18:18
Re: Joke Of The Day! 708 randompHactor 10-Nov-16 18:26
Re: Joke Of The Day! 546 Brian Patterson 10-Nov-16 19:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 612 molder 11-Nov-16 06:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 612 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 04:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 584 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 05:53
Re: Joke Of The Day! 717 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 05:53
Re: Joke Of The Day! 768 Aeschylus 12-Nov-16 07:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 635 Aeschylus 13-Nov-16 06:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 731 molder 13-Nov-16 13:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 674 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 07:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 694 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 08:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 605 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 08:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 624 Aeschylus 15-Nov-16 08:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 636 Brian Patterson 15-Nov-16 17:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 757 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 04:42
Re: Joke Of The Day! 612 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:34
Re: Joke Of The Day! 627 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 05:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 586 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 690 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 633 aurora 18-Nov-16 05:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 655 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 05:58
Re: Joke Of The Day! 735 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 05:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 706 aurora 18-Nov-16 06:04
Re: Joke Of The Day! 795 Aeschylus 18-Nov-16 07:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 744 Aeschylus 19-Nov-16 00:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 708 Aeschylus 20-Nov-16 22:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 662 Aeschylus 22-Nov-16 06:41
Re: Joke Of The Day! 743 Eddie Larry 26-Nov-16 04:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 661 molder 26-Nov-16 07:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 676 Eddie Larry 26-Nov-16 05:15
Re: Joke Of The Day! 714 Sirfiroth 01-Dec-16 16:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 672 molder 02-Dec-16 11:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 679 molder 06-Dec-16 04:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 673 molder 13-Dec-16 04:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 667 Brian Patterson 13-Dec-16 16:22
Re: Joke Of The Day! 767 molder 23-Dec-16 06:40
Joke Of The Day! 618 Dr. Troglodyte 24-Dec-16 20:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 665 molder 27-Dec-16 09:49
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Re: Wheelbarrow Man 667 molder 27-Jan-17 03:30
Re: Wheelbarrow Man 828 Brian Patterson 28-Jan-17 21:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 773 molder 07-Feb-17 22:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 655 Brian Patterson 08-Feb-17 17:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 744 michael seabrook 12-Feb-17 00:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 785 molder 16-Feb-17 04:09
Re: Joke Of The Day! 759 Eddie Larry 26-Feb-17 03:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 750 carolb 01-Mar-17 01:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 718 Eddie Larry 01-Mar-17 19:45
Re: Joke Of The Day! 622 carolb 01-Mar-17 20:14
Re: Joke Of The Day! 738 Eddie Larry 02-Mar-17 22:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 656 carolb 02-Mar-17 22:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 597 michael seabrook 05-Mar-17 22:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 721 carolb 05-Mar-17 23:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 618 michael seabrook 11-Mar-17 23:26
Re: Joke Of The Day! 701 carolb 11-Mar-17 23:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 584 randompHactor 12-Mar-17 00:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 675 carolb 12-Mar-17 00:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 691 michael seabrook 12-Mar-17 07:16
Re: Joke Of The Day! 632 carolb 12-Mar-17 13:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 595 michael seabrook 12-Mar-17 20:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 623 carolb 12-Mar-17 21:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 622 randompHactor 12-Mar-17 21:27
Re: Joke Of The Day! 639 michael seabrook 21-Mar-17 14:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 697 carolb 11-Mar-17 23:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 625 molder 03-Mar-17 03:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 664 molder 10-Mar-17 02:24
Re: Joke Of The Day! 712 Brian Patterson 10-Mar-17 16:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 696 molder 21-Mar-17 08:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 620 michael seabrook 25-Mar-17 08:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 772 molder 04-Apr-17 02:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 721 molder 21-Apr-17 03:02
Re: Joke Of The Day! 630 Archaic 21-Apr-17 22:44
Re: Joke Of The Day! 495 molder 24-Apr-17 04:37
Did you hear about the Doctor on the United Flight? 843 Archaic 24-Apr-17 10:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 545 Brian Patterson 24-Apr-17 14:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 586 molder 25-Apr-17 05:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 765 molder 02-May-17 10:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 666 Brian Patterson 02-May-17 23:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 697 molder 09-May-17 02:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 598 AstralDruid 17-May-17 06:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 607 michael seabrook 17-May-17 21:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 527 Brian Patterson 22-May-17 18:03
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Re: Joke Of The Day! 628 molder 24-May-17 01:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 588 molder 27-May-17 11:05
Karma - angry ole' geezer gets his come-uppance! 617 carolb 30-May-17 19:42
Re: Joke Of The Day! 621 Dr. Troglodyte 06-Jun-17 16:18
Re: Joke Of The Day! 552 Brian Patterson 06-Jun-17 22:25
Re: Joke Of The Day! 638 molder 09-Jun-17 03:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 644 molder 20-Jun-17 01:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 554 Brian Patterson 22-Jun-17 20:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 452 molder 22-Jun-17 22:23
Re: Joke Of The Day! 473 Sirfiroth 23-Jun-17 02:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 695 molder 23-Jun-17 03:27
Re: Joke Of The Day! 586 molder 30-Jun-17 03:31
Re: Joke Of The Day! 548 Brian Patterson 30-Jun-17 18:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 537 Deep1 02-Jul-17 07:21
Re: Joke Of The Day! 462 Brian Patterson 04-Jul-17 15:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 561 molder 14-Jul-17 04:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 522 Brian Patterson 14-Jul-17 17:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 590 molder 21-Jul-17 05:26
Re: Joke Of The Day! 444 Brian Patterson 25-Jul-17 16:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 530 muppedo 26-Jul-17 11:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 614 Brian Patterson 28-Jul-17 14:38
Re: Joke Of The Day! 463 Sirfiroth 28-Jul-17 14:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 565 molder 01-Aug-17 03:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 533 molder 04-Aug-17 03:03
Re: Joke Of The Day! 457 Brian Patterson 04-Aug-17 20:01
Re: Joke Of The Day! 490 molder 08-Aug-17 03:24
Re: Joke Of The Day! 451 molder 11-Aug-17 03:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 459 Brian Patterson 15-Aug-17 15:00
Re: Joke Of The Day! 467 molder 18-Aug-17 05:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 421 Fsbirdhouse 23-Aug-17 17:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 446 michael seabrook 23-Aug-17 21:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 431 Fsbirdhouse 31-Aug-17 16:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 455 molder 31-Aug-17 16:55
Re: Joke Of The Day! 501 Fsbirdhouse 01-Sep-17 04:43
Re: Joke Of The Day! 446 Brian Patterson 01-Sep-17 19:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 445 molder 02-Sep-17 19:50
Re: Joke Of The Day! 462 Brian Patterson 05-Sep-17 15:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 540 molder 15-Sep-17 04:43
Re: Joke Of The Day! 443 molder 03-Oct-17 03:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 493 Brian Patterson 03-Oct-17 23:30
Re: Joke Of The Day! 490 Fsbirdhouse 09-Oct-17 04:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 480 molder 09-Oct-17 05:36
Re: Joke Of The Day! 420 Brian Patterson 09-Oct-17 18:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 457 molder 06-Oct-17 05:07
Re: Joke Of The Day! 477 Fsbirdhouse 09-Oct-17 05:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 466 molder 10-Oct-17 03:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 419 Brian Patterson 27-Oct-17 14:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 410 Eddie Larry 27-Oct-17 17:45
Re: Joke Of The Day! 448 Brian Patterson 27-Oct-17 18:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 424 molder 21-Nov-17 02:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 408 molder 22-Nov-17 21:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 448 muppedo 25-Nov-17 02:17
Re: Joke Of The Day! 456 molder 27-Nov-17 11:19
Re: Joke Of The Day! 415 molder 01-Dec-17 03:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 408 molder 05-Dec-17 04:24
Re: Joke Of The Day! 421 molder 08-Dec-17 03:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 385 molder 11-Dec-17 07:43
Xmas joke 419 drew 13-Dec-17 23:34
Re: Xmas joke 397 michael seabrook 16-Dec-17 07:58
Re: Xmas joke 404 drew 18-Dec-17 00:32
Christmas Joke 392 carolb 18-Dec-17 23:37
Re: Christmas Joke 390 molder 19-Dec-17 04:25
Re: Joke Of The Day! 408 molder 15-Dec-17 03:33
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Re: Joke Of The Day! 385 molder 28-Dec-17 03:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 392 molder 29-Dec-17 00:05
The Two Friends 393 Dr. Troglodyte 31-Dec-17 17:19
Re: Joke Of The Day! 395 molder 03-Jan-18 04:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 403 molder 12-Jan-18 04:05
Re: Joke Of The Day! 376 molder 30-Jan-18 03:49
Re: Joke Of The Day! 457 molder 02-Feb-18 04:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 438 molder 23-Feb-18 22:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 369 molder 16-Mar-18 04:42
Re: Joke Of The Day! 358 Brian Patterson 16-Mar-18 20:33
Re: Joke Of The Day! 395 molder 17-Mar-18 13:04
Re: Joke Of The Day! 381 molder 24-Apr-18 03:35
Re: Joke Of The Day! 363 molder 01-May-18 03:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 362 molder 04-May-18 03:39
Re: Joke Of The Day! 349 molder 11-May-18 04:40
Re: Joke Of The Day! 343 molder 25-May-18 04:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 339 molder 30-May-18 11:28
Re: Joke Of The Day! 337 molder 08-Jun-18 03:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 334 molder 12-Jun-18 04:57
Re: Joke Of The Day! 334 molder 23-Jun-18 00:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 285 molder 17-Aug-18 04:11
Re: Joke Of The Day! 294 molder 21-Aug-18 04:54
Re: Joke Of The Day! 299 molder 25-Sep-18 10:59
Re: Joke Of The Day! 304 molder 05-Oct-18 04:32
Re: Joke Of The Day! 314 Brian Patterson 06-Oct-18 03:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 279 molder 19-Oct-18 04:52
Re: Joke Of The Day! 227 molder 04-Dec-18 10:48
Re: Joke Of The Day! 254 molder 08-Dec-18 05:14
Re: Joke Of The Day! 182 molder 18-Jan-19 04:37
Re: Joke Of The Day! 169 molder 05-Feb-19 11:29
Re: Joke Of The Day! 161 Sirfiroth 07-Feb-19 17:29
Ed’s Deathbed Bequest 151 Dr. Troglodyte 12-Feb-19 18:40
WHAT IF ??? 154 Dr. Troglodyte 13-Feb-19 23:55
Re: WHAT IF ??? 144 molder 15-Feb-19 11:28
Rodney Dangerfield on Carson: 6 mins 164 Poster Boy 15-Feb-19 23:06
Re: Joke Of The Day! 148 molder 08-Mar-19 11:46
Re: Joke Of The Day! 127 molder 12-Apr-19 05:12
Re: Joke Of The Day! 101 molder 18-Apr-19 22:10
Re: Joke Of The Day! 92 molder 23-Apr-19 03:53
Re: Joke Of The Day! 124 molder 26-Apr-19 01:01
Re: Joke Of The Day! 59 molder 11-Jun-19 21:47
Re: Joke Of The Day! 79 molder 12-Jun-19 10:09
Welding 101 70 Dr. Troglodyte 18-Jun-19 19:48
Re: Welding 101 59 molder 22-Jun-19 11:24
bltch 55 Dr. Troglodyte 05-Jul-19 16:43
You had to be there… 42 Dr. Troglodyte 08-Jul-19 17:54
Awesome! 58 Sirfiroth 08-Jul-19 19:07
Re: Joke Of The Day! 37 molder 16-Jul-19 02:56
Re: Joke Of The Day! 68 ldennyjr 26-Jul-19 01:13
Re: Joke Of The Day! 56 Nolondil 27-Jul-19 18:51
Re: Joke Of The Day! 10 molder 23-Aug-19 05:07


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