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You basically described it. I jog, I lift weights, heavy. I skate and play hockey when I can. As I have been, since I was 19 I suppose, I continually tell myself that this is enough. I feel grrreat a lot, but were it not for my wife, my diet would probably be crap.
It's as if I don't want to know what's going on inside of me. That's kind of what I meant by intracies, Aine.
Anyhoo, it finally occurred to me that such evasiveness is based on my own fears and has nothing to do with my own family needs. I need to get clear on this for them.